The Reason Why
by TheBreakfastGenie
Summary: Gibbs likes Abigail Borin. So why won't he date her? Why does he refuse to get too close to a strong, beautiful redhead? Angsty mentions of past Jibbs. Gibbs/Borin, sort of. Emotional one-shot. Listed as "romance" but hardly romantic.


The Reason Why

**A/N:** I know on the show there's a pretty significant age difference between Gibbs and Abigail Borin, so in this story they're a little closer. When I heard there was a redhead with the personality of Gibbs I immediately began shipping them.

Gibbs stared at his basement walls, not sure what to do. Since he'd finished the last boat he'd had a hard time starting another. He seemed to have run out of people to name them after. He'd considered Kate as a namesake but something didn't feel right about it. Without a boat to build, Gibbs had become restless, and that had gotten him thinking. Thinking about the case he had just finished and the CGIS agent who had worked it with him. Gibbs didn't appreciate joint investigations, but there was something about Abigail Borin he just _liked_. She knew how to stretch her resources and make things work, a quality Gibbs had a certain admiration for. Borin was undeniably good at her job. Her investigative skills were top-notch, but she wasn't the officer type who promoted at every opportunity. She liked the field, mirroring his own choices, in a way. But it was more than that. Abigail Borin was a beautiful redhead, and that certainly didn't hurt. But she had impressed the unflappable Leroy Jethro Gibbs, and that took real talent. Something about her personality attracted him.

She had told him time and again to call her "Abby," but he couldn't do that. He already had an Abby, his little one, and their bond was far too special for him to share her name with anyone. Which meant most common nicknames based on Abigail were out. Currently, he simply referred to her by her surname. Briefly Gibbs wondered if he could convince her to let him call her Gail.

Abigail Borin was a woman that Gibbs could consider a friend. It was complicated, but then it always was. The pair got along perfectly well, yet in the back of his mind he constantly wondered why he hadn't tried to take it a step further. He had with Hollis. But Borin, she was different. Or, more accurately, she was the same as someone else. Gibbs could not bring himself to become romantically involved with her. Sure, she was a little young, but dating younger women was not something Gibbs hadn't done before. No, the reason Borin remained no more than a friend was a woman who, to the best of his knowledge, she had never even met.

Jenny Shepard had walked into his life, beautiful, red-haired, brilliant. She had challenged everything he took for granted, reminding him to follow his own rule. He had always viewed new agents with a sense of disdain, yet Jenny was exceeded expectations again and again. As happens so often in law enforcement, she had become more than a partner. She had been the best friend he could lean on, the woman he could trust. And he had loved her. But Jenny was gone now, and her departure had torn his heart to pieces. After the first time he had thought it couldn't get worse, but it could. The second time she left, her destination was the cold realm of death. She was unreachable, permanently. And that had hurt more than he thought possible. Gibbs was a stoic man, even alone, and he tried to pretend two years had been enough time to move on, but it hadn't. He doubted it would ever be. Jenny, his Jenny, had been everything. Until she had become too much to lose.

The memory of pain is something that never goes away. Just as every moment with a child was bittersweet as he remembered Kelly, strong, determined women like Abigail Borin ignited a fear within him. Shannon had been gentle, and she had been taken. After Shannon, Jenny had saved him by being the complete opposite. Now he was out of opposites, and he was terrified that another woman similar to a previous one would hurt just as badly. Besides, his old partner was never far from his mind. Leroy Jethro Gibbs could now allow anyone, even someone like Borin, to re-open his wounds. It was easy to forget the pain if you refused to touch the scars. So he kept Borin at arms' length, and kept from falling for her, because the memories of Jenny still haunted him.


End file.
